Article image

These “Monty Python” Quotes Are the True “Holy Grail”

Monty Python and the Holy Grail ranks among the silliest films ever made. Critics have perhaps justifiably called the movie uneven, but amid all the zaniness are many moments of true comedic genius — enough of them to cement The Holy Grail’s status as a cult classic and one of the greatest comedic films of all time.

This is all the more impressive considering the minuscule budget that the now-legendary comedy group (Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, and Michael Palin) had to work with. The sheer wackiness of the script — a surreal, ridiculous parody of Arthurian legend, featuring killer rabbits and debates about the air-speed velocity of swallows — made finding investors problematic.

To get the movie made, the Pythons convinced a handful of rock groups, including Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, and Jethro Tull, to help finance the film. The budget remained tight, which explains the need for coconuts rather than horses and the movie’s famously abrupt and bizarre ending.

Here are some of the funniest quotes from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, featuring a host of memorable characters including the Black Knight, the French Soldier, and the anarcho-syndicalist peasant Dennis.

Look, it's my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can.
Sir Galahad (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

Oh, king, eh? Very nice. And how'd you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.
Dennis (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
French Soldier (John Cleese)

Share Quote

We are the knights who say, “Ni!”
Knight 1 (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp.
King of Swamp Castle (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
Dennis (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

There are some who call me ... Tim.
Tim (John Cleese)

Share Quote

I'm French. Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king?
French Soldier (John Cleese)

Share Quote

When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled / Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out / Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat / A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin.
Minstrel (Neil Innes)

Share Quote

Oh, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.
Dennis (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

We're knights of the Round Table, our shows are for-mi-dable / But many times we're given rhymes that are quite un-sing-able /… / In war we're tough and able / Quite in-de-fa-ti-gable. Between our quests, we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable.
Knights of Camelot

Share Quote

Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who.
King of Swamp Castle (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on … That rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!
Tim (John Cleese)

Share Quote

Come and see the violence inherent in the system. Help! Help! I'm being repressed!
Dennis (Michael Palin)

Share Quote

I didn't know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective.
Woman (Terry Jones)

Share Quote

On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.
King Arthur (Graham Chapman)

Share Quote

Featured image credit: Desintegrator/ Alamy Stock Photo

Author image
About the Author
Tony Dunnell
Tony is an English writer of non-fiction and fiction living on the edge of the Amazon jungle.
Play more header background
Play more icon
Daily Question
Fill in the blank: "I wish I could show you when you are lonely or in darkness the astonishing light of ___." - Hafiz

More Inspiration

happiness theme icon

Reach out your hand if your cup be empty, if your cup is full may it be again.

separator icon
Robert Hunter
motivation theme icon

A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.

separator icon
Yoko Ono
hope theme icon

One shouldn't just hope to be treated well: one must insist on it.

separator icon
Abraham Verghese
love theme icon

Maybe happiness isn’t what you believe, but who you believe.

separator icon
Phoebe Waller-Bridge
wisdom theme icon

Only the ephemeral is of lasting value.

separator icon
Eugène Ionesco
happiness theme icon

All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware.

separator icon
Martin Buber
motivation theme icon

Don't plan it all. Let life surprise you a little.

separator icon
Julia Alvarez
hope theme icon

Don’t be nervous. Work calmly, joyously, recklessly on whatever is in hand.

separator icon
Henry Miller
love theme icon

He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.

separator icon
Friedrich Nietzsche
wisdom theme icon

He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much.

separator icon
Bessie Anderson Stanley
happiness theme icon

The difficult is what takes a little time; the impossible is what takes a little longer.

separator icon
Fridtjof Nansen